The Honest Toddler: A Child's Guide to Parenting

Description

The toddler stage can be a rude awakening for parents, whose sweet infants morph, seemingly overnight, into tyrants. Their iron will is matched only by their adorableness and changeability: a toddler will take your hand and say "I love you," then slap you in the face.Parents aren't blameless, though--toddlers have their own grievances. They just don't express them "with their words," whatever that means. But finally, after minutes of horror, they have The Honest Toddler to speak on their behalf. Who better to instruct parents on the needs of toddlers than a toddler himself, who can authoritatively spell out preferred toddler foods (fishy crackers: stat!), sleep training methods (hint: none), and the proper response to bananas with strings (complete collapse).With a voice that is at once inimitable and universal, The Honest Toddler has built a loyal following of parents laughing through their tears as they recognize their own child in the shenanigans of one bravely honest toddler. From the indignity of a trip to Canadian Tire to the rough park justice of sand-throwing, from the legal torture that is a night of cry-it-out to the outrage of being served diluted apple juice, The Honest Toddler sets the record straight in this indispensible guide to parenting, toddler-style."Thought I ate an M&M. It was a button. I regret nothing.""Lady offered me a piece of chickpea loaf. Hit it out of her hand because that's what cake would have wanted.""Oh, we're out of cookies? Well, now we're also out of unbroken television remotes, so deal with that."