How to Have That Difficult Conversation: Gaining the Skills

I have grown and healed in ways I never realized I needed to due to the boundaries series. I have come out of codependency and been able to practice self respect and healing from deeply rooted fears of abandonment and invalidation, but as not everyone is on the same path as I am I have come into relationship with different levels of defensiveness. From my family of origin to my romantic life, conflict/boundaries has been interpreted negatively at times and other times I saw fruits, after reading this book I I have implemented new skills to not only have my own boundaries but also encourage security in the person I am confronting heart. If you are looking to confront someone who is difficult and reactive, understanding how to speak to their fear while respecting the heart of the healthy confrontation will create bridges to healing in both of you. Totally worth the read and I couldn't put it down because I knew this coming conversation was going to be hard and love was more important than pride.

I choose this rating because this book is more than a simple book on difficult conversations. It gets at the heart of the problem when attempting a difficult conversation....the people interaction part. I have read other books on the topic that seemed very passive or was very quick to encourage you to find a way out of having the difficult conversation. I know from peroxide experience avoiding these conversations splits teams, destroys families and breaks up friendship s. This books gives you the spiritual guidance, the necessary communication skills and examples on might one deal with these issues.

The practical advice and examples make it easy to apply in all areas of your life!Difficult conversations are no longer difficult and the outcomes are better.

If your relationship is in a bad place, read this book. You may also benefit from "The Lost Art of Listening" by Michael P. Nichols and Martha B. Straus. Both books will give you constructive ways of looking at the problem, your role, and what to do about it.Pros: The book offers some very good ways of thinking about relationships, communicating boundaries, and dealing with difficult topics. It offers practical advice on how to communicate in ways that get the desired results. It talks about how to take responsibility for your own feelings and for communicating them in a constructive manner. The short of it is: Take the emotion out of it, and communicate in facts.Cons: The authors quote scripture to emphasize their recommendations. For me, this greatly undermines the message. When it comes to psychology, I prefer justifications that are evidence-based rather than faith-based. You may or may not agree with me.On the whole, there is valuable information in these pages.

A friend used this text to help my and another teen work through their broken relationship. Incredibly helpful. They were able to articulate and discuss some highly emotional events and actions in a God-honoring way that brought healing to both.

A perfect addition 2A codependents Library.I felt like it really broke down some of the issues we face with confronting difficult people and assessing our own flaws and why we don't. Written with much compassion for those who struggle

I purchased a copy of this book for myself, some time ago. In my opinion, it's a book every person should read. I have since purchased copies for friends & family members. Dr.'s Henry Cloud and his cohort John Townsend have written many informative, enlightening books which I recommend for everyone!

Great book on how to handle difficult people in your life. The only thing is I thought it was going to be different than boundaries and give more guidelines on how to approach conversations but it seemed like just an extension of his book Boundaries. Nothing new really.

This book had a lot of amazing tips in it. I was not expecting religion to play such a huge role in this book and it did make it less enjoyable for me.

A perfect read for anyone like me who struggles to confront people in their live about things that upset them. The book is based on and references the Christian faith, but don't let this put you off as the content is still relevant and true. Consider any purchase as a great investment in yourself.

Anything by Cloud and Townsend if worth purchasing and this is no exception!

This book has been very good in deciding what to do in certain relationships with others.

I'm 40 pages into the book and quite annoyed that the editor/author is using the pronouns "he" and "she" to indicate a human being - regardless of gender. There is no explanation in the introduction, or preface, as to why this is the case. The implicit message seems to be, "literature used 'him' to represent mankind so now we are going to even the playing field."On page 36, "...or distant from the other person. As much as you are able, be warm and available to him"On page 39, "Think about how you disconnect from another person when she tells you what you are feeling when it is really what she wants you to feel."What's wrong with "them" or "they"? "Available to them" and "when they tell you"? Why not refer to human beings as human beings? Why muddy the reading by throwing in "hims" and "hers" arbitrarily to refer to both genders?When I think about how I "disconnect from another person" I am thinking about how that happens with males and females; then the editor/author uses either a "he" or "she" and it sounds as if I am to think that I only disconnect with a certain gender.I needed to get that off my chest.